Male Bashing!
It caused you a lot of pain, and after it was removed you found out you didn't need it anyway.
Women dream of world peace, a safe environment, and eliminating hunger. What do men dream of?
Being stuck in an elevator with the Doublemint twins.
Why do men name their penises?
Because they want to be on a first-name basis with the person who makes all their decisions.
What is a man's view of safe sex?
A padded headboard.
How do men sort their laundry?
"Filthy" and "Filthy but Wearable".
Why did God create man?
Because a vibrator can't mow the lawn.
Did you hear that they are going to stop circumcizing men?
They discovered they were throwing away the smartest part.
A woman participating in a survey was asked how she felt about condoms.
She said, "Depends on what's in it for me."
How can you tell if a man is thinking about sex?
He's breathing.
How can you tell when a man is well-hung?
When you can just barely slip your finger in between his neck and the noose.
What do you call the useless piece of skin on the end of a man's penis?
His body.
What is the difference between men and women...
A woman wants one man to satisfy her every need.
A man wants every woman to satisfy his one need.
A couple is lying in bed.
The man says: "I am going to make you the happiest woman in the world"
The woman says: "I'll really miss you"
Why are married women heavier than single women?
Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed.
Married women come home, see what's in the bed and go to the fridge.
What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
A widow.
What should you do if you see your ex-husband rolling around in pain on the ground?
Shoot him again.
posted by y2kira @ 6:07 PM
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